RSS Feed

Category Archives: Posts

Dowry-plague to our society

Posted on

“Jahez banana hai uska.”
“Kitna jahez maanga hai unhon ne?”
“Jahez nahn le kr ayi bahu? Haww hayee.”
“Beti ko susraal main basaana hai, uski izzat bnwaani hai, acha jahez tayaar krna hoga.”
“Unhon ne waise tou jahez nahn maanga par keh rhay hain jo ap khushi se de dain..”
“Jahez ek laanat hai.” FINALLY.

If you’re someone from the South Asian society, you must have heard about ‘jahez'(dowry). Dowry is the “essential things” such as furniture, appliances, car etc. that a girl brings with her to her new home after marriage. When you talk about essential things, what comes to your mind are the girl’s clothes, or things for her personal use like her laptop etc. ¬†Now the problem is that what the society expects a girl to bring with her are not at all essential, I mean did the groom and his family live without beds in their rooms and sofas in their lounge? Or did they not have a television or a fridge before? The society we live in ¬†EXPECTS a girl to bring with her all these things-the more expensive stuff she brings with her, the more likely she is to settle down in her “new home”without any problems or else she’ll be humiliated or worse the groom’s family might even call off the wedding if the girl’s family does not meet these demands. This is the plague to our society, dowry is the curse upon us that we HAVE to break free from.

Stupid traditions such as dowry have made marriages more of a curse than a blessing. They have taken away the beauty from this union of two families and made it more of a bargain and a burden for the girl’s family. Isn’t marriage supposed to be about two families coming together and creating a new bond of love and support, why do we have to complicate it with materialistic things? How can furniture or appliances determine a couple’s happiness or bring love between them? Untitled

Most Pakistani families cannot meet the expensive demands of the guy’s family which is why they either have to take up loans or their daughters are simply rejected and are not thought worthy of a rishta. Are we judging a girl’s worth based on the expensive furniture she brings? What about her education, her achievements. her as a person?! When did we become so materialistic? Somebody needs to take a stand against this. My cousin ended her relationship of 7 years just because in the end the guy’s family asked for jahez. She questioned them that she has studied from the same school, the same university as their son and is even earning more than him then why is she obligated to bring with her furniture or appliances to validate her existence in their house?
My grandmother had five daughters and not even a single one of her son-in-laws ask for dowry. In fact my father said that if my mother even bring along a single pillow, he would throw it away! Why cannot more men take a stand today?

I was just wondering about this when I saw this amazing TVC of Orient’s.

I was awe-struck by how beautifully Orient had managed to discourage the practice of dowry and bring ‘Rishton Mein Innovation’. Orient shows that parents give their daughter everything, when they are marrying her to a family, they are giving away their most precious thing, why should they be forced to pay for anything as if they are “selling”their daughter or that the groom’s family did them a big favour by marrying their daughter and they need to be indebted for that. This ad challenges the societal norms and stands against this evil curse of dowry and hopes to bring a change in the mindsets of the Pakistani people.

Kudos to team Orient for this amazing ad that aims bring ‘Rishton Mein Innovation’which I am sure it will because already a lot of people have been inspired by this ad and hopefully a lot of men and their families will stand against this, and they’ll learn that a girl herself is the best gift her parents could give them and it’s the people who make memories and not the furniture/appliances.

Here’s to Rishton Mein Innovation and that more families find son-in-laws like the one in the TVC! :’)


Resurrection (Guest Post by Shahroze Jafar)

Posted on

Sitting here with dried up ink pot and fresh, piercing thoughts.

I will attempt to note down my vivid emotions on paper.

I cannot cry.

I try and I try but not a single tear leaves my eye, rolls down my cheeks and falls in the dried up ink pot.

But here I sit, beginning to weep my thoughts and make the paper flooded with it once more,

Because this is the only way I can cry.


Posted on

So I pick up this pen to write about how I feel

Only to realize I don’t feel anything at all,

A heart that once loved you with fiery passion

Has been left broken, cold and numb,

So I write to you to tell you I love you

Because that is all that I had learnt to do,

I write to you to tell you all my feelings were true and if only you knew,

They said give it time and let it heal,

But what do I do now when there is nothing left to feel?